My story is kinda complicated. I dated a girl for 3 1/2 years when I was in California. The more time that passed with us the more lies were given. When her brother landed in prison, my gf at the time told me all details but her parents pulled her aside and asked her if I know and she told them no. Thats when the first lie was born.
Then I had to move away and on the last day we spent before I moved she had made an attempt on her life but I stopped her from doing it. She told me I can’t watch her 24/7 and once I tried to hide the sharp objects she told me. I can always overdose on my medicine. I pulled her aside and told her everything was going to be OK. She told me never to tell her step-father and mother the truth. A Choice that has bothered me from that moment on. Her parents got home and she acted like nothing happened.
As I moved away and as time passed this bothered me more than her as I tried to get her to just tell them what happened. She told me if I ever tell them any lie we have told them that she would cut off our friendship and never talk to me again. She even came to the point where I caught her in lies to where she told me she told them the truth and she is going to therapy. Convinced me she told them the truth and it wasn’t as bad as she thought.
Now she got so desperate she got back with her ex (the one before me, who actually admitted to cheating on her when she was with me). It just got worse with them as they both agreed to get engaged over Christmas. She would talk to me on the phone about how much money he has (he knows how to use and control her because money is why I had to move away from her), the ring and all the stuff he is buying her love with. It bothered me to the point to where I was hurt and sent a nasty email to her. “I said you are full of lies”, “If you don’t tell your parents the truth it will get worse” I even said I have a audio confession on tape I will play for your parents if you don’t tell them the truth” (Which is something I did a while back that has her admitting that she tried to kill herself)
She must of got upset by that email because she forwarded it to her parents. They replied back telling me not to contact her again or they will get the police involved or take me to court. I replied to her parents email saying I was sorrying if I offended anyone and I respect his wishes. I don’t know if they read it. Her mom is still friends with me on MySpace so maybe they don’t hate me as much as I am thinking. Since then I haven’t talked to her in over a month. I have been thinking that her parents probably questioned her about the email which mean either explain the letter or she told another lie. She might of lied to cover her *** and told them I was just being jealous but if her parents think that I wrote that because I was jealous then they are wrong. I just wanted her to be honest with her parents about what happened. Maybe had some jealous because of the engagement but the letter had nothing to do with her “engagement”. What should I do? I have been restricted on my cell phone so I can’t call her for 90 days (she did this before, which is another thing that set me off). I can’t call her house line I don’t know it. The only thing I can do is record me talking on a web cam and talk about everything from my perspective. The suicide attempt, her brother and try and explain myself. Maybe even include that recorded conversation I taped so they believe I am telling the truth. Should I try and clear the air with her parents by confessing the truth or leave it be. I think it is her parents and maybe the fiancee from having me contact her. I think my ex just got upset and created this bad situation for her. She knows if she contacts me that maybe her parents will start to think that what I wrote in that letter was the truth. I do believe my ex wants to talk to me but can’t because of the lie she had to tell them to protect herself. All she does is lie and her parents don’t see it. They think she is a perfect little angel.
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Thats tough. On one hand I would say let it all go and forget it all. Buuuut on the other hand you dont want her to actually end up hurting herself when they may have a way to prevent it before it could happen. I think thaat if you do end up telling them….dont come at them like your trying to get your revenge. I think first you should state that this is your last contact with the family because you dont want them to overreact. Tell them you are genuinely concerned about her safety…and give them the details. They have to know shes possibly a danger to herself.
Oh and since your still friends with her mom on myspace you could send a myspace message instead of a video. But a video might be better if you want them to hear the recording.
tell her parents about the letter it is the healthiest thing you can do in a situation like this.
I wish I could help, but you really need to talk to a councillor with this.
I wish you luck.
i have no clue i agree seeing a counselor about this subject is best.
If you really care for her then you would tell her parents to save her. Which is worse? seeing her dead or knowing she is alive but not being able to speak to her? time will heal everything. Just don’t talk to her for awhile and start talking to her again. Maybe one day she will come back and thank you for saving her life.
Wow…this is difficult to respond to because there are many possible solutions to how to handle this…
1)you can let it go- it may not be what you want to hear, but if all of this trying is just making the situation worse it may be best
2)find someway to get in touch with her parents- dont just talk to them over the phone if you can do this meet face to face and be sure to look them in the eyes and tell them EVERYTHING you have explained on here. If they are still too stubborn to admit there is a problem after that…idk what you can do
3)try finding another way to reach out to her- tell her that you were sorry about the email andthat you’re just scared for her and that she means too much to you to just let her be treated the way she is and how you feel about her trying to harm herself. She may not want to hear it but when you let her know she wont forget you told her as long as you keep your calm while explaining it
4)Talk to someone else about it- maybe someone else who knows her? see if they will help you reach out to her or her family?
I hope this helps you in any way.
Your life should be a movie.
Seriously I’m sitting here with my laptop, reading this sad story, eating yo-plait whips and I’m just thinking “Wow, this girl is drama.”
Move on. I’m sorry, but ignore her.
If she is a liar (and a good one) and you are thinking about somehow being with her until you die, then that’s a horrible waste of time. ‘Cause half of your lives together has been a lie.
Just let her to be, and if she ever tries crawling back to you all you can just say is “Idk.” Keep your distances. Btw this freaked me out “she told me. I can always overdose on my medicine.” Did she mean you or her? If she is actually threatening to kill herself then that’s a red flag! Your lucky you moved away from her. If it’s you then I’m really sorry, but man up. Why would you even try to kill yourself over her? You are way better than that. Your just this innocent guy stuck in family drama and you just want to be with her minus all the lies and live happily ever after, well that will never happen :/
I’m so deeply sorry.
Xoxoxo.
You are in a giant mess here, bigger than you should have to handle. I’m sorry for that.
You have tried to get her to confess and be out in the open.
You have really done all you can.
If you contact her parents and tell them of this awful story you will be out of your place. You may even cause her to kill herself. She is still alive right now, and that’s a good thing.
If her parents are too know it is her place to tell them. You’ve sparked interest there and that’s good and bad, buy if you wanted to tell them then you did enough.
Step away from this situation and cease all contact with her and her parents.
You are clearly making the situation worse at this point. If you want to be friends with her you need to wait at least 6 mounths to a year. No contact!!!
Do not let this haunt you anymore! You have really done all you should.
And doing anything more could end up with you being thrown into jail :/
just stop. It’s hard I know, I really do! But this situation has no room for you at this point and won’t in the future.
It is very common for people to highly consider and even attampt suicide, buy most pass quickly and will not return easily. It’s all going to be okay if left be. But if agrivated by what your wanting to do here it might end badly for you and her
sorry but it’s just how it is
holy **** that was a great story bro. Was alot to read, but worth it. Yeah your ex really should tell the truth, lying about things of that magnitude only tend to escalate worse into the future. However, it does sound like you are a bit jealous, which just means you still have feelings about her. If the parents could some how implicitly find out, that would be the best relsolution, but in general I hope something will change in one of you or the other.
I think you should definitely contact her parents and let them know what’s going on. Let them know that you didn’t lie about it, and let them listen to the confession of hers. Knowing and hiding what she does is no better than her lying about it. There’s something seriously wrong with her, and she needs help. She’ll get mad at you for it, and not talk to you for awhile. But at least you’ll know that she’s safe and she won’t hurt herself anymore. At least you can tell yourself that you helped her and that’s the best thing a friend can do.
Wish you luck.